Monday, November 30, 2009

Chart of Lust 2009: From Clooney to Capaldi
An awful lot stirred our loins in 2009. Pop stars and politicians. Silver foxes and works of fiction. Polly Vernon documents a nation's lust …

The Observer, Sunday 22 November 2009

(Book lovers - check out #9)

▲ 1 PETER CAPALDI
Because Malcolm Tucker is sheer, unmitigated genius; because he injected undiluted brilliance/ sweary filth into In the Loop and the very latest series of The Thick Of It. Because he directed and featured in Jo Brand's exquisite Getting On. Because CoL cannot get enough of him. Finest bloody actor of his et cetera.

★ 2 STATIC: BARACK OBAMA
Not for the fan-tabulous oratory or offering the world new hope, but for what he looks like in tight shorts on the beach.

▲ 3 MICHELLE OBAMA
Actually, you know what? CoL fancies 'Chelle more than Barry. You heard it here first.

★ 4 STATIC: EDDIE IZZARD
After whom CoL has lusted for decades. In '09, however, Izzard lust was totally reaffirmed after our very favourite transvestite (sorry, Alex Reid) took the certifiably bonkers step of running 43 marathons in 52 days. Why? For charity, of course!

▼ 5 DIZZEE RASCAL
For the "Has anyone seen Kate Moss's lipstick?" moment (see YouTube for further info). As well as the ace, unapologetically commercial grime.

▼ 6 GORDON BROWN
It's been a bad year for a good man. CoL would like to reassure Gordo that she still loves him. And probably would. (And PS Her handwriting's terrible, too!)

▲ 7 TAKE THAT
Anyone who made it to this summer's Circus tour knows what CoL means. You have not lived until you've clapped out Never Forget, live. Or seen Jason Orange's thighs in action.

★ 8 STATIC: BLUR
As above, but substitute Song Two for Never Forget, and Damon Albarn's moist-eyed gratitude for Orange's thighs.

9 NEW ENTRY: EMMA MORLEY
Earnest, quietly beautiful, endlessly wise heroine of David Nicholls's excellent novel One Day. CoL has a sixth-form girl crush on Morley, and Morley's fictional aspect is no barrier to this.

▲ 10 IAIN MORRIS 'N' DAMON BEESLEY
Comedy co-writers who turned puerile into an art form for their miracle series The Inbetweeners (E4; Channel 4), and vastly improved CoL's life experience in the process. CoL expresses gratitude via the medium of lust, as you perhaps know by now.

Read the full lust list of 40 here.

Footnote:
Chcek out the July Guardian review of ONE DAY .

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